quarta-feira, 5 de agosto de 2009

Unable to disconnect

Summer is the time to sit outside looking at the stars and do a balance about life. I find myself very often lost of any concentration and thinking about things that don't make any sense. Things that happened my daily life, even the smallest ones, sometimes repeating themselves in my brain without end.

I don't know if this happens to you, but very often after watching a movie I can't disconnect of it and I keep reliving the scenario in my real life. An example is, yesterday I watched "Alle Anderen", by Maren Ede and as I was walking to the tram station I couldn't stop thinking as the main character would do, from what took place in the movie. The character was somehow more open and direct as all others and she was even said to be "ridiculous". And so was I thinking as this person would react in my reality, what would she think of the things I was seeing. Another example was, I watched last year a movie about some criminals stealing gold bars from one of those secured bank vans and how they had the idea of transforming that gold into little Eiffel towers , as the ones sold to tourists, so that they could be transported out of the country. After I watched the movie, I wanted to do some shopping and I started thinking as I was committing a crime and if people walking on the street would recognize me and call the police.

Another thing happening to me is that I dream a lot. Very often I wake up in my room and don't recognize it as my own, thinking that I am somewhere else. As it happens for sometime now, I try to close my eyes very hard and try to transfer myself to where I should be. Sometimes I know it's just a dream, other times I try to understand where I am and why did I end up there, falling again asleep trying to convince myself that everything will be fine when I awake in the morning.

Am I going crazy?

Sem comentários: